Pain

Song for the Broken Hearted

Song for the Broken Hearted

Ezra Blackwood

Who knew that love would have such a bitter taste?

And the bliss of ignorance could never be replaced?

That the day would come where I would have to set you free,

Or that when you left you’d take the better part of me,

And while they say the brightest stars leave the blackest holes,

They forgot to mention it would ever be this cold,

Alone,

With nothing left to hold (no, no).


Still, part of you won’t seem to go away,

Reminds me how I hate this each and every day,

And I’m well aware of all the consequences,

I see how loving you has left me so defenseless,

So you can keep that broken heart that you quietly stole,

You can take those broken dreams, but you won’t take my soul,

No, no,

This love has taken its toll (on me).


And, maybe it’s true; we’ve made every mistake,

But, baby, you’ll still be the hardest habit I’ve had to break,

I’ll turn my head to the skies, pray that love leave these eyes,

Cause now I know how much a heart must break before it is wise,

Seems like when we love, it just leaves a scar,

And all the new cuts cover where the old ones are,

We couldn’t have known, we would lose much,

But that doesn’t mean I won’t still miss your touch,

No, no

I’ve just got to let you go (don’t go).


If you asked me right now, I’d have to say that I’m fine,

Then drown all of the lies I’d tell inside this bottle of mine,

Because the truth is, my dear, I can’t handle these tears,

Or feeling like we’ve hurt enough to last a thousand years,

And how the bed that we shared, is still made up on your side,

Can’t stand looking back and wondering if we really tried,

No, no,

I guess now we’ll never know (no, no).

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Regret

In this moment of silence

Don’t pity me my pain

It’s here in isolation

I fall on your disdain

For all that pulls me under

I know there is a Hell

There’s nothing I know better

I know it all so well

Shamed into my solitude

And left with little care

Lost within my speechless grief

My glorious despair

I had hope and I believed

But yet the sun still set

And darkness fell upon me

To bathe me in regret

Libertine


Whisper softly to me
Take away my fears
Build me up
Then break me down
And leave me with these tears

Undress me with your lies
Do what you do best
Twisting words
To spin your guise
Cutting deeper than the rest

Nowhere left to run
Face what you have done
See the pain
The hopes you’ve slain
And accept what you’ve become

One day you will fall
Hanging by a thread
Use, abuse
Every excuse
In the end you had to lose

Heartless

They say our heart is where we harbor love. Many would argue that it’s the very place where love exists in all its glory. Perhaps there was a time when this wasn’t such a silly notion to me. But over the years, if I’ve learned nothing else about my heart, it’s that it has its limits. There comes a point where the depth and extent to which we are able to love others diminishes almost entirely. For some of us, there comes a point when, amidst all our pain and suffering, our hearts simply don’t have anymore love left within them.

Once upon a time there was a boy that loved. He loved deeply, and he loved completely. But somewhere along the way his heart grew cold and then it died. To fill the void, he began to steal the hearts of others to offset the emptiness left where his once was.

But to say he is “heartless” is a malapropism. Anyone who feels as much as he does couldn’t ever possibly be classified as heartless. What people might fail to consider, is that his heart is actually too full of feelings for him to find clemency, mercy, or grace within it. He is capable of feeling these things, but is unable to find it within himself to do so because they’re lost within a sea of darkness, which keeps him cold and unloving. Once he allowed himself to be overwhelmed with love, but it was taken away and so that sea rushed in to take its place.

Consider the alternative reality that those we consider to be the most evil are in all actuality the ones who are most adept at love. It’s like the saying goes: “Those who are heartless, once cared too much.”

 

Finding Purpose in Pain

Denial, withdrawal, and the isolation of one’s self from others. All are characteristic of a person experiencing the repercussions of deeply felt emotional pain. Self-inflicted pain, physically, mentally or emotionally, is far reaching and a stranger to no one. Show me an individual that claims to have never attempted to find a means of inflicting one form of pain or another on themselves at any given point in their lives, and I will show you the face of denial. But why would anyone want to feel pain?

The answer to that question is actually very straightforward: Because we want to feel alive, because we want to feel period. For some of us, pain has a purpose. It is all that remains to remind us that our hearts are still beating. A close friend once told me that the reason he liked being tattooed was because it was excruciating. He explained that this physical agony, which he actively sought out, was a means by which to feel something, anything at all. At the time I thought this to be a bit odd, however, after many years of observing those around me behave similarly in their own unique ways, I too have begun to see the benefits and advantages of feeling pain, even though my own personal pains are not physical.

If we ever wish to understand why it is we seek out and harbor pain, we must first start by finding the root or cause of it. We must identify and examine the instances in our pasts that set in motion the negative changes that would lead us to this very moment in time. Have we any hope within us of rectifying a problem and implementing the modifications necessary to forge a better existence, we must begin with an appreciation and comprehension of all the relevant factors that contributed to our present state of being. Only by doing this may we begin our journey in the pursuit of balance and harmony. We must realize that we need to always experience both ends of the broad spectrum of human emotions in order to fully appreciate them. To abuse one is to diminish its worth and, in very much the same way as any other addiction, you will eventually find that you require an increasing amount of it to achieve even remotely similar results. Sam Veda said it best: “A life devoid of struggles is a life bereft of happiness because the value of happiness is realized only after pain.”

Everyone has heard someone mouth the all too familiar platitudes we’ve grown to loathe and abhor: I share your pain, don’t dwell on it, you have to move on, this too shall pass, we all have problems, time heals all wounds, happiness is a choice, don’t linger in the past, there is someone worse off than you, etc. Personally, I find these to be less than helpful and mildly disingenuous, but I digress. We as humans would do well to teach ourselves how to take full advantage of both emotional pain and bliss. Discovering and using healthy outlets that work for us in times of need and heightened emotion is an ideal way of taking all of that energy, all of that joy or misery which has awakened the passion and fire within us, and using it to give birth to what may just end up being our greatest works.

Finding ways of harnessing all of this emotion is the key to becoming stronger and more resilient. I’ve found that when a person has dealt with a great deal of pain in the past, they are numbed or desensitized to the mundane issues that lie ahead and are able to venture forth in life with more confidence with respect to any future obstacles. How could those challenges yet to come possibly compare with what they’ve already endured to some extent in the past? In the end, it comes down to how you curtail your mindset and your actions to foster personal growth and development. All pain is not bad. It instills us with mental fortitude, can trigger and inspire us in ways we never thought possible, teaches us valuable life lessons, and so much more. But above all else, it is our own personal afflictions that teach us to treasure those special moments that, when all is said and done, truly make life worth living.